Fact and Fiction

"Hey there."

"You came! I almost thought you wouldn't..."

"Well, You know I can't NOT come when you ask me to."
"But the last time..."

"...Things ended on a sad note, and you said you wouldn't think of me ever again. Yes, I remember. I go back to that moment every minute, every second of my existence. It’s like my life paused in that one moment."
"There is a reason why I said what I said. Neither of us wanted the same things, and it was just driving me crazy."

"You are wrong about one thing though, it was never MY needs that got in the way. It couldn't have been."

“You know what I mean. And if you want me to say it out loud, fine I will. Yes I was being selfish. And I probably still am. That’s why I wanted to see you this one last time before...”

“Go on say it, I am not gonna complete every sentence for you. At least not this one.”

*whispers* “Before I give up on you. For now and forever.”

“Now let me say what you called me for. For what you want to hear from me.

I AM what keeps you rooted.

I AM what makes you who you are.

Without me, you are lost, not the same person. You can’t take a step without me by your side, not take a decision without consulting me first.

You think I am your weakness, when the truth is that I am your biggest strength.

In the last two months, you never reached out to me, despite wanting to, not once, but many times.

 I know how much efforts you had to make to avoid me, to avoid thinking about me; To NOT call me in the middle of the night.

And has that helped you? No!

 In the last two months, you have been driving yourself like a machine! Not a minute’s pause, not a second’s break. You have been avoiding everything and everyone.

You have adopted this persona, this farce of a personality. Someone you think you are happy being, but that is actually just a fragment of who you really are.

You’ve been running away from everything. As if by avoiding reality is the only way you can avoid me.”

“It’s so easy for you say all these things. Do you have any idea what I have been through over these two months?

When I knew that calling you is no longer an option? When I knew that I can’t reach out to you when I needed the comfort of familiarity?

Over the years, reaching out to you has become an instinct. You say you keep me rooted, that’s an understatement. You were the only one I can rely on blindly.

But with things changing the way they were, I cannot continue doing that.

I can’t rely on you to be my knight everytime I am stuck in a sticky situation, not with you not wanting me to do that.

It’s unhealthy of me to do that, when there is nothing that binds us together in front of the world. Hell you don’t even want people to know that we talk the way we talk. Or that we connect the way we do. Or that we share this bond, that defies all logic”

“There is a reason behind why we cannot be together right now. You have to first get to know who you really are, and what you are capable of. It’s tough for me to be around you when you doubt your own capabilities. Because that leads to you doubting me, and that is not something I can live with.

I know I have been non-committal towards you all the time, but that’s only because committing right now, would in a way be me holding you back. And that’s not what you deserve.

I don’t want you to ever feel that you had to give up on your dreams, your ambitions to be with me, because I know if you had been in my place, you would have wanted the same for me.

So, go pursue your dreams, be where you have to be right now. And when you are done with it, we’ll discuss US then.”

“And what if I change? What if I find my strength someplace else? Worse, in someone else?

Would you be happy to see me at a point in life, where you are nothing but a person I once knew?”

“Understand one thing, that’s what you are afraid of. Not me. I know you better than you think I do. You are not someone who will change for the worse, who will let go off reality and do a 360 on everything and everyone.

Also, since you want me to think that way, if that happens, I will probably not exist anymore. Not because I will do something to myself, you know I can’t and won’t do that.

 But I have a feeling that the only way I can lose you, is if I lose myself. As long as I continue to be who I have always been, you will never ever forget me.

Remember, like you’ve always said, if it’s meant to be, we’ll find a way to be together.

Destiny has always played a very vital role in our lives, forcing us to cross paths, when we least expected it.  

So I will let the Almightly play out whatever story He has written for us, and I will never stop answering your call. And someday, oneday, you will be where you want to be, and I will be there by your side.

In that hope, I rest my case.”

“It’s almost time, I don’t think I can stay longer.

Will I ever get to see you again?”

“Only you can answer that.”

“In that case, when will I see you again?”

"Whenever you need me, I will be right here.

In your mind; in your imagination.

All you need to do is to think of me."

And the wind that blew him away, was the wind she let go off…

With that the spell was broken, and so was the dream she couldn’t let go off.

“If by holding my breath, and closing my eyes,

Is the only way I can have you by my side,

I know this is not the place for me,

I know this this life is not right.

Yet I will not lose hope,

And I will never give up this fight.

Because I  will forever yearn to be where you are,

Day after dawn, and dusk before night.”